Mucus Madness!
by artemiswood15
Summary: Shuichi is at home sick,depressed,lonely,clueless,hungry and out of tissues!What will he do in order to destroy the translucent menace that haunts his arm?Read find out,and review!NO DON'T SCROLL DOWN YOU JERK!GET BACK UP HERE NOW...YEAH NOW READ ME!


Mucus Madness ~ By Cula B. Cloverman

**Disclaimer**: **I am not responsible for any injuries, bodily dysfunctions, harm, pregnant men, blindness, or death that may occur after reading this fanfict…I mean…I do not own gravitation or any of its characters.**

It was 11:50 A.M. on a Thursday in Tokyo. The sun was shining in a not- going-to–blind-me-but-still-bright-way and the citizens were out and about on the streets having fun and going about their lives. Everyone that is, except for Shuichi Shindou.

By this time Shuichi would be at the studio belting out his narcotic songs and rehearsing with Sakuma-san and Hiro-kun for the upcoming concert being held at the Tokyo clubhouse this Saturday. Only one slight problem: he was as sick as a friggin dog.

He woke up this morning with a cough like a smoker who "just quit", diarrhea, a headache from hell and a runny nose. Now he was in bed, pale green, breathing deeply and depressed about missing his rehearsal.

"Why me," the pink haired drama queen cried in agony, "what did I do to deserve this cruel and unusual punishm…ah..ah..AHH-CHOOO…gah!"

"Maybe" his lover, Eiri Yuki, started, inhaling the nicotine of a cigarette, "If you turned on that gumball you call a brain and didn't go to that drinking pool party with Ryuichi in the middle of the friggin' winter, you could actually breath right now. Damn brat…"ended Yuki puffing a black cloud of smoke into the singers face.

"WAAAHHH, Why are so mean to me Yuki. And when I'm feeling so horrible!" Shuichi cried.

"Shut up, grow up and learn how to take care of yourself." The author spoke while throwing the cigarette butt in the bin, "Don't go dying on me."

Shuichi's purple eyes widened to the size of soccer balls "Awww Yuki you do care!" Shuichi attempted to sit up in bed and kiss Yuki, but Yuki hit him instead.

"Owww, what was that for?"

"Don't even think about kissing or even touching me until your cured. The deadline for my new book in on Saturday and I really don't feel like typing with various substances coming out of my…er…everywhere." Shuichi pouted and turned away from his boyfriend and then started coughing.

"Oh, cut the crap and take your medication," said Yuki, holding out a spoon of…something.

Shuichi eyed it for a moment and turned away in disgust.

"There is no way I'm putting **that** into my mouth"

"Alright then I'll do it, there is no way your getting **me** sick you damn brat".

Yuki then pushed the spoon towards Shuichi's mouth but he in turn just pursed his lips together and closed his eyes. Yuki tried to push the metallic spoon through the stubborn idiot's mouth but it wouldn't budge. Instead Yuki leaned to far,fell on Shuichi and spilled the whole spoon of medicine on his face and favorite designer sports jacket. Which now that he thought about it wasn't the smartest thing to wear when around Shuichi. Damit!

"OH I'm so sorry Yuki, I didn't mean too I.."

"Save it!" Yuki said angrily and walked out the door not forgetting to slam it shut.

Now he was sick, depressed, lonely and covered in medical goop!

He took the tissues next to him and started wiping off the goop. Shuichi considered going to tell Eiri that he was sorry but he was more then likely out of the house by now. He stared at the clock on the wall for a second : 12:10. Shuichi didn't realize it before but he was starving not having eaten anything except for bland soup when he woke up.

"Great..ah..ah…AHH..CHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" The 19-year-old watched as a geyser of mucus volcanoed out of his nose and dripped down his face. After recovering from the shock he turned his left for the tissue box…. it's empty. He used the last on them on Yuki's great fall. Fabulous.

"uh-oh" he was about to wipe his on the pillow when he remembered Yuki.

"He'd kill me if I coated his satin pillows in mucus," The singer wiped the thick liquid onto his arm and carefully thought of his options.

"Maybe I could go to the bathroom and wash it off." After patting himself on the back for his geniusness, he got out of bed and headed to the bathroom keeping his arm in front of him.

When he got to the bathroom door he heard the shower turn on. Yuki stayed after all! But now what was he going to do? The door was locked! He knew the sink in the kitchen wasn't working after he clogged it with his giant record breaking sized gumball and it won't be repaired until Friday.

"Well at least I can get some napkins in the kitchen,". That was a hopeful thought. Unfortunately the only thing in the kitchen was beer, old bread, knifes, leftover bland soup, dead flowers, a broken sink and several paper clips.

"Why didn't I go …ah…ah…AHCHOOOO…*sniffle* shopping?" Now the singer was in a dilemma. Even more snot dripped down his face and he brilliantly wiped it off with his clean arm. Now he was a sick, depressed, lonely, clueless, hungry and both of his arms were covered in snot.

Shuichi stared down at his arms in defeat.

"This is all your fault!" he whined to the unresponsive globs of goo. What was he going to do now!?!

"Ah…ah…ah…CHOOOOO!" IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER DOESN'T IT!

Once again the young vocalist face was covered in mucus. That was the last straw! Shuichi raised his left arm , looked around to make sure Yuki was still in the bathroom, opened his mouth and sucked all of the snot off of his arm and into his mouth.

"MUHAHAHAHA Take that fiend!" Shuichi cried in triumph! Surprisingly it tasted…. good, great actually. Maybe it was just his hungry stomach playing tricks on him, but did is taste salty? _No! that's disgusting_, Shuichi thought, _I can't even believe I just did that_.

He used his now clean arm and wiped the remaining secretion off of his face. _Uggh I can't just leave it there!?!_ The teen resumed sucking his arm and the salty menace. Little did he know that a certain tall blond was staring at him in the doorway smirking.

Shuichi finally satisfied in his solution turned around and jumped in surprise.

"Ahhhh! Yuki were you standing there the whole tim…ah …ah ..ah CHOOOOOO…dam!"

"You ready to take that medicine?"

**Authors Note: The moral to this story kids is listen to your superiors and just take the damn medicine! My little brother and me are sick right now and this scenario just popped into my head this afternoon after talking to my friend on the phone…long story. Now on the bottom of the screen, right under this it says, "Feedback/Review" , and you see this button is a personal friend of mine he says, "If you have any moral values or sense of decency click me and REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!" Take my advice and OBEY THE BUTTON! **


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